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Kirk Woodlawn
December 24, 2025
Mendoza Gears Up for Rose Bowl by Binging ‘Little House on the Prairie’
Kirk Woodlawn
December 19, 2025
On-Again, Off-Again Dad Blames No Chimney for No Presents
Kirk Woodlawn
December 16, 2025
Che Guevara Shirt to be Worn at Family Christmas to ‘Skip the Small Talk’
Kirk Woodlawn
December 1, 2025
Planned Parenthood Mistakenly Buys 2,000 IEDs
Kirk Woodlawn
December 1, 2025
Bostonian Born Again Upon Introduction to Euchre
Kirk Woodlawn
November 22, 2025
Viscous Personal Attacks Primed for ‘Freshman 15’ Jokes
Kirk Woodlawn
November 19, 2025
Hank Ruff One Slur Away From Country Music Stardom
Kirk Woodlawn
November 14, 2025
Anti-Capitalist Puts Protest Supplies on Dad’s Credit Card
Kirk Woodlawn
November 7, 2025
Mendoza Inks Lucrative Deal with Durex
Kirk Woodlawn
November 6, 2025
Ellettsville Volunteer Firefighters Charity Calendar Raises $0.00
Kirk Woodlawn
November 5, 2025
Mayor Vows to Annex Nashville
Kirk Woodlawn
November 1, 2025
Rebranded IDS Print Reinstated as President Whitten Named Editor-in-Chief
Kirk Woodlawn
October 30, 2025
AI Used to Recreate the Fatal Elvis Shit
Kirk Woodlawn
October 28, 2025
Bloomington South Students Build Homes They Will Only Ever See as DoorDash Drivers
Kirk Woodlawn
October 20, 2025
Pure Terror at Spencer’s Gifts as Bride of Chucky Box Found Empty
Kirk Woodlawn
October 18, 2025
School of Informatics Students Suspended for Brutally Hazing AI Humanoids
Kirk Woodlawn
October 14, 2025
Townie, Student Secretly Rendezvous Like Modern Day Montague and Capulet
Kirk Woodlawn
October 12, 2025
Rival Vintners Seize, Destroy Oliver Winery Vineyard in Savage Challenge to Long-Held Power
Kirk Woodlawn
October 9, 2025
Disheveled Nicolas Cage Seen Leaping from IU Archives Balcony, Clutching Scroll
Kirk Woodlawn
October 8, 2025
Cuban Brings ‘Shark Tank Live’ to IU with Tragic, Predictable Results
Kirk Woodlawn
October 5, 2025
Unhinged, Unregistered Lance Armstrong Terrorizes Hilly Hundred Riders
Kirk Woodlawn
October 4, 2025
Ghost Adventures Crew No Match for Coach Knight
Kirk Woodlawn
October 3, 2025
Bob Seger Recalls Writing Hit ‘Night Moves’ at Night Moves
Kirk Woodlawn
October 2, 2025
Sage Steele Spends Entire IU Trustees Meeting Hawking Ivermectin
Kirk Woodlawn
October 1, 2025
Mellencamp Admits ‘Pink Houses’ Really About Boyhood Obsession with Barbie
Kirk Woodlawn
September 30, 2025
Bartender Begs Jesse Eisenberg to Stop Explaining Zombieland Rules
Kirk Woodlawn
September 29, 2025
IU Limits Free Speech to One Phone Call from Jail
Kirk Woodlawn
September 29, 2025
WonderLab Skink Norbert, GEICO Gecko Announce Engagement
Kirk Woodlawn
September 23, 2025
MoCo Humane Society in Hot Water for FB Marketplace Listings
Kirk Woodlawn
September 21, 2025
Guerrilla Journalist Catches ‘Farm Stop Collective’ Abusing Alfalfa Sprouts
Kirk Woodlawn
September 19, 2025
Tri-North Teacher Suspended for JFK Quote in Facebook Bio
Kirk Woodlawn
September 18, 2025
Trump Vows to Purge DC of “Woke” Bloomington Limestone
Kirk Woodlawn
September 16, 2025
Holographic Earnhardt Straight Up Crushing at Bloomington Speedway
Kirk Woodlawn
September 15, 2025
5-Star Interdimensional Power Forward Bursts Through Transfer Portal
Kirk Woodlawn
September 14, 2025
Mayors of Flavortown, Bloomington Establish Diplomatic Ties at Hinkle’s Hamburgers
Kirk Woodlawn
September 13, 2025
Kleindorfer’s Rebrand Leans Into Germanic Pagan Roots
Kirk Woodlawn
September 12, 2025
IU Health Surplus Store Selling Refurbished Sternum Saws
Kirk Woodlawn
September 11, 2025
Divorced Dads Drive CrossFit Surge Ahead of IU Parents Weekend
Kirk Woodlawn
September 10, 2025
Mayor Declares Bloomington Exotic Animal Sanctuary City
Kirk Woodlawn
September 9, 2025
Council Ditches ‘Sister City’ Palo Alto, Decries Gender Specific Nature of Title
Kirk Woodlawn
September 8, 2025
ICE Deports Entire IU Latino Studies Program
Kirk Woodlawn
September 8, 2025
Local Russians, Ukrainians Set Aside Differences to Honor Rasputin
Kirk Woodlawn
September 7, 2025
Pledge Leaves Illinois Dispensary Like Indentured Columbian Drug Mule
Kirk Woodlawn
September 5, 2025
BPD, IUPD Feud Over Sample Gates Jurisdiction
Kirk Woodlawn
September 4, 2025
MeatEater Crew Kills, Field Dresses Hoosier the Bison
Kirk Woodlawn
September 4, 2025
IU Now Down to One Major
Kirk Woodlawn
September 4, 2025
First 1,000 Fans to Receive Cignetti Autographed Pack of Marlboro Reds
Kirk Woodlawn
July 20, 2025
Runcible Spoon Outed as Host of Underground Fight Club
Kirk Woodlawn
July 20, 2025
Mellencamp Blames Meg Ryan Split on Her Performance in ‘You’ve Got Mail’
Kirk Woodlawn
July 16, 2025
Sink the Biz Blamed for Hand, Foot, and Mouth Outbreak
Kirk Woodlawn
June 27, 2025
New Unionville Baptists Rally to Rename I-69, Citing Indecency
Kirk Woodlawn
June 17, 2025
VH1 Behind the Music Probes Straight No Chaser Drug Use, Promiscuity
Kirk Woodlawn
June 15, 2025
Pence Criticizes IU Kinsey Institute with Full-On Erection
Kirk Woodlawn
May 29, 2025
Morning Walk Past 3rd Street Fraternities Reminiscent of Jonestown
Kirk Woodlawn
May 5, 2025
Xavier Johnson Inks Lucrative NIL Deal with Durex
Kirk Woodlawn
November 17, 2024
Shadow Seen on Walk of Shame Means Two More Weeks of Antibiotics
Kirk Woodlawn
October 26, 2024
Planned Parenthood Mistakenly Buys 2,000 IEDs
Kirk Woodlawn
October 6, 2024
Freshman Tells Roommate How Morrison and Cobain Wrote ‘Let It Be’
Kirk Woodlawn
September 29, 2024
Kenyan Students Look to Dominate IU Dance Marathon
Kirk Woodlawn
December 6, 2023
Che Guevara Shirt to be Worn at Family Thanksgiving to Skip the Small Talk
Kirk Woodlawn
November 20, 2023
Buskirk-Chumley to Raffle Tickets for Seat Next to Lauren Boebert
Kirk Woodlawn
November 14, 2023
Cooters, Nation’s First Bottomless Bar, Hosts Grand Opening
Kirk Woodlawn
November 13, 2023
Police Use Nextdoor App to Target Residents with Too Much Time on Their Hands
Kirk Woodlawn
November 8, 2023
Sock on Door Handle Just Good Way to Binge Dawson’s Creek in Peace
Kirk Woodlawn
November 8, 2023
Toddler Spikes Ice Water Off Floor Like Super Bowl MVP
Kirk Woodlawn
November 7, 2023
Content Feverishly Readied for OnlyFans Black Friday Deals
Kirk Woodlawn
November 7, 2023
Several Hospitalized After Stampede at Winter Farmers’ Market BOGO Sale
Kirk Woodlawn
November 2, 2023
Subway Jared Wishes He Would Have Stayed Morbidly Obese
Kirk Woodlawn
November 2, 2023
Dumb Kid Gets Smart Phone
Kirk Woodlawn
November 1, 2023
Fans Flock to Assembly Hall to Hurl Chairs in Remembrance of Knight
Kirk Woodlawn
November 1, 2023
City to Send Humanitarian Aid to Gosport
Kirk Woodlawn
October 31, 2023
Black Cat Tragically Crosses Path of Chevy Silverado
Kirk Woodlawn
October 31, 2023
Professor Okay with Smoking in Class if He Can Bum One
Kirk Woodlawn
October 31, 2023
Embittered Former Denny’s Manager to Release Juicy Tell-All
Kirk Woodlawn
October 30, 2023
MinuteClinic Full of Shit
Kirk Woodlawn
October 30, 2023
Rough Time of Year for Jack O’Lantern
Kirk Woodlawn
October 26, 2023
Mayor Wolfs Down Entire Bag of Smarties to Ease Fears of Eating Glass
Kirk Woodlawn
October 26, 2023
Holographic Earnhardt Set to Race at Bloomington Speedway
Kirk Woodlawn
October 25, 2023
Cook Medical Now Selling Discounted Used Catheters
Kirk Woodlawn
October 20, 2023
Morgue Open to Public Over Halloween Weekend
Kirk Woodlawn
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